Notes to Myself

I always find myself wanting to write, but not having my journal with me. So oftentimes when I'm on trips, I'll write on a random piece of paper. I always tuck it somewhere...and later on...when I eventually discover it again...it's like I have a little note to myself. I recently found a note that I wrote while I was in Austin, Texas last year during a business trip.

I especially like this part of my note:

Whenever I do go on trips and I'm walking around - looking for my destination - I feel like there's something else I'm supposed to find. Today, I saw my first butterfly in Austin and paintings by Fidencio Duran that reminded me of gatherings at Barnes Park in California during the earlier parts of my life. Am I supposed to find old memories in new places?

(Sigh)

I miss how I feel when I'm traveling - how the world seems so exciting, how I'm so eager to get up with the sun so I have all day to do what I want to do...I always feel like my senses are heightened and I remember always vowing to live every day like I'm traveling. Then, I come back to my own life and trap myself in all these little games I make up for myself...I think my newest one is ripping out every cool exercise I see in my Self, Fitness and Shape Magazines. Then I sort them into exercises for different parts of the body, put then in protective covering and stick them in my work out binder. This process is actually not as nutty as it sounds...quite simple and relaxing...because to me - it's enjoyable and that's what counts. And sometimes...for a surprise...I can turn to a page and just do whatever exercise I open my binder to. Hmmm...I think I'm sounding crazy.

The point is...today I feel restless.

There's something I'm supposed to be doing. Oh yeah...studying.

Ugh.